Prometheus (2012) Director: Ridley Scott

Prometheus has a tough job on its hands - it was never going to please the hardcore Alien fans with their expectations of the origins of Ridley Scott's masterpiece, or live up to the massive hype surrounding it. In many ways the film is flawed and leaves us with so many questions, rather than the answers we wanted, but if you take it for what it is - and leave your own plots and origins behind - it's an enjoyable movie.
What's right with it
- The special effects, especially watching in 3D, are WOW. Spaceship Prometheus takes forward the familiarities of the Nostromo and then some - the hypersleep pods let you look into the thoughts and dreams of others, and the port and starboard are super hi-tech and expertly captained by Janek (Idris Elba). The storm sequence is intense and when we finally come to the 'money shots', they pay off. BIG TIME.
- The story. It's not so bad. The evolution of humans, and of the alien, are plausible and moves the Alien story on. It's all a bit chicken and egg - it'll leave you questioning what came first, but surely this is better than coming out of a film brain dead and indifferent? However, if you're looking for a direct prequel to how the space jockey ends up where he is in Alien, you'll be a little disappointed.
- The cast. Noomi Rapace does a sterling job as our new Ellen Ripley, Dr Elizabeth Shaw. She's strong, and she's a survivor. Michael Fassbender is excellent as android David - his 'calm' exterior and occasional change of expressions are chilling and say far more than the script could. It would have been good to have seen his character develop further, especially his motivations for his interactions with Charlie Holloway (Tom Har...or should we say, Logan Marshall-Green). Also noteworthy are Charlize Theron as The Company's cold Meredith Vickers, and the already mentioned Idris Elba who's great as the Captain. His seduction of Meredith brings some well-needed comic relief.
- The legacy. It's thrilling to see 'what happened before' played out intelligently - whilst some fans ultimately will be angry, it's Ridley Scott's vision and it's pretty neat. Sure, we're not quite with him on some character motivations or 'why didn't THAT happen?' but it's amazing to see this come to fruition.
What's wrong with it?
- It's not scary enough. There will be no screaming in the cinemas. This isn't the game changer of Alien, and it doesn't give us the huge, huge joy ride of Aliens. We have some yuk scenes - pregnant women should NOT watch this film - but there is nothing here which is terrifying. We wanted to be terrified! What is more scary is the impact of what happens in Prometheus to humans - we get a glimpse here of how it came to be, and that's really nasty.
- It's just not Alien. Okay, I admit it. I'm hands up too! I wanted more of the little blighters. I wanted chest bursting, face hugging and gore a plenty. Compared to Alien/s, Prometheus is a trip to a petting zoo. The 'ship' does indeed go down, but not in the fashion that we want it. The roller coaster is avoided.
You should all really go and make your own minds up though. Ignore the reviews, and ignore the critics. We'd be interested to know what you think of the movie.
3/5 "ooooww, have I got heartburn?" *SPLAT*